Wednesday, January 27, 2010:
Went to Krista's house!
Thursday, January 28, 2010:
New Glasses + Contacts! (Finally) HD! HD VISION!
Saturday, January 30, 2010:
Went to Krista's house.
Safeway with her and her cousin.
Ordered Pizza.
Briana, Briana's sisters, Mariano, Joyvey came over.
Procrastinated and did some of the video.
Sunday, January 31, 2010:
Joyvey's house next!
Krista, Me, Mariano, Adam, and Daniel were there.
Having fun watching them act.
Loved the food. Nom.
Wednesday, February 3, 2010:
What the hell, I broke down crying on the phone because of you. I fell a part, thinking about you again. How sad am I? I told him over and over how I truly felt. It felt like nothing is going through him, like he had no feelings for me back anymore. He had asked me about what if someone had asked me out? I was wondering why this all of a sudden. He had told me that he wanted to ask out Nikki. I was asking him if he really felt anything for her. His response, "I don't know." I was giving up. I had said, "Go ask out Nikki! Bye, I'll talk to you later.." and dramatically hung up. I broke down crying. Few seconds later, he had called me. He called several times until I picked up the phone. I ended up saying, "I hate you! I hate you! I don't care anymore!" and kept crying on the phone. He did not want to leave me like that. He tried to calm me down. Stopped crying after a while. Realized something. Maybe, just maybe it was going to do something. So, I had suggested that we completely just stop talking to each other for two days until he came over to my house on Saturday. It was going to be hard avoiding talking to him, but I have to deal. Plan was to make him realize some what of what he'll miss if he does not talk to me at all. Maybe pull out more of how he truly felt. We were just talking until one because if we hung up then, we would have to wait until Saturday to talk with each other then. We wanted the talking to last, but we had to go sleep.
Thursday, February 4, 2010:
Ahh! The pure torture! His voice that I could not hear in the morning! I'm that attached to him. School kept me occupied. After school, it was rainy. Oh, how I hate the rain, the gloomy weather, the wind that messes up my hair that I fixed up. I went with my parents to the mall, and I was utterly bored. I would usually call him, but I couldn't. I just walked around, thinking about the many things running through my head. Went to go get my eyes examined because of the contacts that I received. After a while, I kind of forgot that my mother gave me her umbrella, and I had put it in my bag. My mind was completely lost. So, when I was speaking to my mom while walking around, I had mentioned that I did not have the umbrella. She suddenly became mad and panicked about her umbrella. Her mood was pissed off. I then realized that my bag was a bit heavier, so I opened it, and the umbrella was in there. I had told her, but then she was still pissed off and yelled at me. I didn't know how to react because I was about to cry. I walked away quickly, and went to the couches in the mall where you could relax. I sat there, and broke down completely. I was too stressed from everything, I just wanted to punch a wall. My parents found me and we sat there for 15 minutes. I did not know what to say, so I just looked away the whole entire time. We finally got up, and went to get my step dad's glasses. My mom had asked if I wanted to eat at 'Red Robins' and so we went. Got there, ordered, and she had asked if I could ask Dandrich about something. So, I had to text/call him later. I became a little happier when I had to do that. We ate, went home, and I called him. Spoke for a few minutes, and then hung up. Not much response.
Saturday, February 6, 2010:
Dandrich was coming over today. I was feeling utterly scared. I did not know what to do, say, or think. I didn't know how he was going to react either, but I thought, "Hell, I'll just go with it." Told him to bring his xbox controller and a few games. He was there, in front of my doorstep. After 2 weeks not seeing him, my heart just melted away. Uh oh, this was not going to be good. He had brought the games 'F.E.A.R' & 'Borderlands'. We played 'F.E.A.R.' first, and I was getting scared. Stupid girl scaring the crap out of me, damn. He watched as I played, chuckled when I got scared, and then we switched to 'Borderlands'. Good thing it was two player because I felt really awkward when he was just watching me play. We both played for a while and had fun. Later on, we stopped playing, I sat on the floor, while he sat on my bed. He played music on the xbox, while I was just staring at the random things in my room. My mind started to lose it. I could not think anymore, I started to breathe heavily. I took my phone and walked outside in the front and sat on the bench. I broke down crying. I did not want my neighbors to start staring, so I went to the backyard and sat on the swing set. I continued crying, listening to music and just stared off into space. I went back inside a few moments later because it was getting terribly cold. I went back to my room, sat on the floor again, tearing. He sat next to me, asking what was wrong. I did not respond. My mind was too in shock of him being there. I never broke down in front of him, so he did not know what to say really. He had asked me why this all of a sudden, why I was crying, how I felt. I told him that he was the only one to ever break my heart. I continued crying. He then held me and told me about his true feelings. He still loved and cared for me deeply. He thinks I'm the right one for him. But he did this all to try and see if his feelings will become stronger and we'll be together later on if we realize it. It still sounds kind of messed up for him doing that, but I don't think his feelings will change much for me. I was just worried he'll get attached to another girl, but we'll see. We started kissing at the time too for the last time as we thought. We both still have feelings for each other. We were officially over for now, but we're going to see if our feelings will grow stronger if we date other people because we're still young, and if we are right for each other, then we'll be together again one day. He was telling me about if I do hate him, do I have any feelings for him still. I told him that I didn't hate him. Then he was telling me that the last two days without talking to me was killing him. We just hung around my room after a bit, holding hands, kissing still, and such. Then he had to leave. Those last few moments with him, that was the one I loved, the one I've been missing for a few weeks..
Sunday, February 7, 2010:
Got up, spoke to each other on the phone. We were actually talking to each other normally now. I liked that. I had to work on the video all that day, but I wanted to talk with him more. So, the day flew by, procrastinated a bit on working on the video. We webcammed for a while because he had asked. I was kind of surprised, I don't really know why. Webcammed/mic'd with each other. It was Superbowl Sunday! So, we both watched it. Supposedly he was going to go to a friend's house to watch it, but he didn't. I love the commercials though, funnyyy. As we watched, we had an idea, we were going to bet each other. Uh oh. It was Saints VS. Colts. Colts were ahead by about 8, and I thought they were going to win. My intentions were wrong. Haha. We had a bet that whoever lost has to call the other person every time for a month. I had suggested to pay for the movies and such for a bet, but he didn't want me to use money. I had lost the bet, so now I had to call him. Me, calling him every morning to wake up and night before we sleep. He usually did it majority of the time. We had fun watching it, I screamed so badly when I lost. Victory for you, ehh?! Well, when it was done, I had to finish up the video project. He tried to stay up with me on the phone, but I kept telling him to sleep. I thought it was really sweet of him for staying up with me, or at least trying. He fell a sleep, so I just put the phone on the charger and left it on speaker. While I was working on it though, the phone had died for him, I guess. I continued working, hoping to finish. There was a 'slight' error when I was doing the video though. Part of the clip kept closing 'Sony Vegas' and it was scaring me. When I tried opening it again though, all the clips did not work. I was on the verge of tearing. I tried my best to revive it. I seriously broke down and tried calling Dandrich. I kept thinking, "Fuck my life! Fuck my life over and over again! Shit!" It was 12 AM, and I thought of a way to get my project back, I deleted the part of the clip that kept screwing up the whole entire thing. Hallelujah!!! It worked! Got back the majority of the video project. Rushed in finishing in. My eyes were dead tired. I went to go sleep. Stress, stress, stress.
Part 2
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